Sunday, August 10, 2008

"Men"

I’m at the beach with my husband, my sons, my son-in-law, and my daughter. Daughter and I will be surrounded by men! And I couldn’t be happier. (She’s happy, too, as long as they pick up their wet towels.)


Some critics say that romance novels depict men not as they are but as women would like them to be. But I like men. Guys. I like the way they move, laugh, talk, and smell, the way they pound on each other to show affection and don’t hog the hot water in the shower. I like the way they offer to carry the beach chairs and the boogie board and the groceries up two flights of splintery stairs. I like the way they can entertain themselves for hours by throwing baited lines into the ocean and cheerfully take me out to dinner when they don’t catch anything.

Anthropologists and zoologists find the same pattern of male competition and the male’s drive to provide across cultures and species. Not only because the male of whatever species must drive off or defeat his rivals, but his prowess - his ability to protect and provide - attracts his mate.

It attracts us as readers, too. We enjoy reading about those “alpha” heroes, those big, protective guys. Which no doubt explains the popularity of Navy SEALs, gun slingers, cops, and the Undead.

Status and the ability to provide also encompass social power and monetary power, which why we love heroes who are dukes and billionaires.

Establishing the male’s fitness as a mate isn’t only a matter of physical prowess, of wealth or social standing, but of competence. Nora Roberts has said that to a woman with two small children, a hero is the man who can fix the toilet on a Saturday night. This may explain part of the popularity of the “nerd” books, in which the hero’s mental competence is at least as important as his physical strength.

I’m married to a man who can cook. I think one of the sexiest things a guy can do for a woman is feed her. Sooner or later in my books, the hero always feeds the heroine. I don’t care if he’s alpha or beta, he is a provider.

One of the joys of writing the Children of the Sea was the difference between the heroes: rock steady, down-to-earth police chief Caleb in Sea Witch (excerpt)
and sexy, moody bad boy Dylan in Sea Fever (excerpt). Some of my favorite scenes were the ones between Dylan and Regina’s son Nick as Dylan learns what it means to be a hero who can protect and provide.

So, who are your favorite heroes, in real life or in fiction? And what do you wish your man would do for you? Leave a comment as I'll be giving away a copy of "Sea Witch" to a random poster at the end of the day.

13 comments:

Echelon Press Publishing said...

It's funny you should bring this up. Just this morning I told my husband I had never felt safer than I do with him. I recently had heart surgery and ever since, I swear he sleeps with one eye open.

I was getting back into bed last night after...well a nightly trip...and as I was getting back into bed, he jumps up, grabs me, and asks if I'm okay. He thought I was falling out of bed.

Usually he does this when I roll over. It is a little annoying, but when you tink about it, it's sweet. Even when he is asleep, he is thinking of protecting me.

No better hero than that. And he cooks wonderfully, irons his own work shirts, and waters the plants every day. Definitely a keeper!

Karen Syed
www.karensyed.blogspot.com

Terri said...

Fantasy Heroes - Indiana Joens, Han Solo and other swashbucklers. But in the read world, a man who has the courage to be himself and not worry about what his friends think. LOL

Terra57 said...

Virginia, Thank you so much for blogging with us today and I do admit that there is nothing like a man who can cook his way to a womans heart.

I also am very lucky that not only can my dh cook like a pro but he loves to spoil me in the process with it. Opps, here comes the drool. (grin)

I must say that Sea Witch was a jewel of a book and I just received Sea Fever and it is eating at me but I do have a few others that take priority first. I do so hope I have the patience to make it through the priorities without caving in.

I hope you are having a wonderful time at the beach today with the men of your life and I wish I was there with you. It's raining here again so no beach days in sight. Enjoy sweetie!
huggs,
Terra

tetewa said...

I think some of the things a man can do to really make a woman happy is help around the house with housework. Going grocery shopping to can also be very considerate, just help us with things that we do on a daily basis! Nice havng you here today!

sidhevicious said...

I think any man who can get past his "caveman" tendencies to help a woman do whatever it is that needs doing, and do it without grumbling about it is a good man. And if he can do it in a romantic way... well, HELLO! Of course, it also helps if he can cook! :) Oohh, and massages are wonderful too.

Rose!~ said...

Oh yeah, men are special, and for me? Well, I like that mine indulges my extreme love of football, then teases me unmercifully until the preseason exhibition games come on in the fall. I also love how he doesn't disturb me when a game is on, and will even sometimes watch with me.

Yup, you guessed it! He is not much of a sports fan, but puts up with me while I watch my teams duke it out in football!
Hugs,
Rose!~

BreiaB said...

I would love it if my DH could cook, but at least he'll wash dishes. He is a great provider and protector. He is my hero because I know I can fight my own battles but he'll still be there to back me up. Some fantasy heroes are the Alpha male type, Brendan Fraser from the Mummy movies and people who can make me laugh.

Virginia Kantra said...

Karen, your husband definitely sounds like a keeper! I think illness can bring out the very best--or the worst in our partners, and I think it's so sweet when one takes care of another. (Just got back from reading Carlyle's Never Romance a Rogue on the beach, which is about this very thing.)

Virginia Kantra said...

Terra, thanks for the welcome and the kind words about Sea Witch!

The NC coast is very different from Maine, but in my ,um, book All Beach is Good Beach.

Oooh, ooh, I loved Harrison Ford as Han Solo. (And my favorite parts of the new Indy movie were when he was with karen Allen. I never thought he belonged with those other women!)

I'm a big Brendan Frasier fan, too. Haven't seen the new Mummy movie, but I loved him in the old ones. And in Scrubs.

Virginia Kantra said...

Yeah, a guy who's there for the daily stuff, whether it's grocery shopping or sharing the couch during a football game, is a hero for me.

I think that's why most of my heroes--even the ones who aren't quite human--have to show their awareness of what's important to the heroine in her everyday life.

Lemonitsa said...

I want a man who will smile at me from across the room and with that one look make me fly. :)

There are many heroes on TV that make me drool but I know that I won't find that in real life. I'll be happy with someone who is caring and thoughtful and who will want a family. Bonus points for being a bit of a handiman and a helper. (and of course, I will want to do things for him, too hehehe)

Yup. I think that's about right.
cheers!

Annette Blair said...

Hi Virginia, My husband is my great hero. He cleans, does the laundry and grocery shopping and household and business bookkeeping. To him, cooking means getting takeout or nuking something. But I'm not complaining: I write.

What more can you ask of a guy. Oh yeah, he has a job, too. LOL.
Best of luck on your wonderful series. Hugs,
Annette

Wendy said...

Aw, Karen, your husband sounds wonderful! :)

I don't have a man but if I did, I'd wish he'd give me a back massage, lol!